Three New Ways to Not Run

Do you hate running more than anything else in the world? Well, I''m here to help. Hi, I'm Mia Taylor, a student at a junior high. I have some important information that you need to hear. Do you ever think, "gosh, boy do I hate running, but I have to so that my heart doesn't fail." Well, I have good news for you. With these new, top of the line exercises, you may never need to run again! If you do them now, you can loose an unspecified amount of weight! But wait, theres more! Exercise now, and you will loose double an unspecified amount of weight in an unspecified amount of time! It's almost to good to be true, so you better go quick!

Say no to running! Courtesy of Sync Fitness

My first magical exercise to replace running is the stationary bike. Its like a regular bike, but when you pedal, it doesn't go forward- crazy right? But, spinning on these bikes can burn calories like nothing else, and is a great way to get in your daily dose of cardio (or monthly, if you're like me). Another plus? If you have really bad joints, like knees or ankles or something, spinning on a stationary bike can actually help you joint pain. It really is like magic. You can go just six minutes on this thing and get all the cardio you need for the day. If you don't have any idea what to do on a spinning bike, you can go to a class (the one I linked to is for a really good spinning class at Silver Mountain Sports Club), or look up one of the billion routines that are on the world wide web. Here's one that Japanese speed skaters do, where you get your total cardio workout in jut 4 minutes! Wow, how exiting, only 4 minutes of exercise a day.

Ooh, how realistic. Courtesy of PixShark

So, there you go, something to do instead of running. I hope you enjoyed this infomercial. 

~Mia

Why Gluten is my New Worst Enemy

I have become part of an age-old feud, almost like the Capulets and Montagues (except literally not at all). Thank you, Mr. Parker, for putting that in my head. Anyway, I stopped eating gluten. I have a few very good reasons, and I'm not saying you should absolutely do it or you're not healthy and you can't read this blog anymore, but I'm just going to inform you of my decision.

First, I'm going to tell you what gluten is, so you can know what you're not eating. Gluten is an agent in wheat that gives it elasticity. If you didn't understand any of that, its just something that's in wheat that makes it stretchy. Gluten is in stuff like cake and cookies and bread and doghnuts and cake and literally everything else that tastes good in the world, unless you actually like vegetables (does anybody?). So, gluten is what makes everything stick together, but it's not all perfect.

Even this beautiful thing has gluten. Courtesty of King Arthur Flour

My biggest thing about gluten is that it makes me feel bloated. It makes a lot of people feel bloated, actually. There is this thing call gluten sensitivity, or non-celiac gluten sensitivity, that is very common. You pretty much have it if you have any kind of bad reaction to eating gluten, like being bloated. There are lots of other examples of bad bodily functions that are related to gluten, but I didn't want to read them all.

I know that there are like a billion diet fads out there, and most of them are completely ridiculous (like what even is the paleo diet? It makes no sense), but cutting out gluten is really something that you should try. There's no way that it could be bad for you, so why not? And, if you cut out gluten you're also cutting out most foods that contain refined sugars, which are really bad for you. And, hopefully, you'll feel a million times better. It's a win-win-win, so why not? Whenever I decide to eat gluten free I regret ever not eating gluten free. I have so much more energy, and I feel so much less lethargic. And, even though you may think it's really hard to find gluten free foods, it's definitely not. If you walk into a grocery store and throw a rock you can hit something without gluten. Especially if you go in the produce section. So, when you come home from work or school or skydiving or whatever, instead of having some crackers or cake, have an apple. Even though I told you earlier that I wasn't saying you should absolutely cut gluten out of your diet, now I'm saying that you should absolutely cut gluten out of your diet. You're welcome.

~ Mia

Water- The Universal Solvent

Fun fact of the day- most people are under- hydrated. As you may guess, this is not a good thing. Personally, I would much rather be over-hydrated than under-hydrated.

Courtesy of PureLiving

So, water is very important for you- after all, over half of you is made of water. I can't stress enough how important it is to drink enough water. I mean, even the background of my blog is water. Yes, it can be very hard to get enough water when you're sitting in a classroom and the teacher won't let you leave, or to know how much water that you've been drinking all day. But I'm here to solve all of your problems.

A while ago my mom went to a nutritionist because she was going on a liver cleanse. This nutritionist lady- Melanie Palacious- gave my dear mother some very useful tips on how to get enough water in your body. And, drum roll please, here they are:

1. How do you know how much water that you should be drinking a day? It's obviously different for everybody. But, lucky for us there is a little math equation to help us figure it all out. First, you take your weight- lets pretend I weigh 100 pounds. Then you divide that in half- so for pretend me, it would be 50. That is how many ounces of water you should be drinking in a day. Notice the key word here- ounces. You don't want to go and drink 50 pounds of water, because I think that you would die from osmosis, but science isn't my best subject. Even thought it seems kind of obvious that you wouldn't drink half your body weight in water everyday, it's an easy mistake to make- because I made it. When my mom first explained all of this to me, I was very confused. But, now you don't have to be confused, because I explained it all. :)

2.How are you supposed to know how much water you get from your "big glass." Is that ten ounces? One? Well, like I've previously mentioned, I have many tricks up my sleeve. The best way to remember to drink your water, and know how much you're drinking, is a handy dandy little water bottle. This part is easy. Just go to the store, pick out your favorite water bottle there- whether it be one with a straw, one that squeezes, or a sippy cup- and buy it. Then, take it everywhere with you. It might not be easy to find a water bottle that you like (oops, am I contradicting myself?)  It took me three tries before I found one that I liked to drink out of. Anyway, once you find you soul-mate in a water bottle, find out how many ounces it holds. For example, my Gatorade squeezy bottle shown below holds 32 ounces. So, since I need to drink 60 ounces a day (whoopsy, now you can figure out how much I weigh), I need to drink two full bottles. See, it's not that hard!

My chosen water bottle, courtesy of DICK'S Sporting Goods

3.My last tip has kind of nothing to do with water, but I'll tell you anyway. One other thing that Ms. Palacious mentioned to my mother is that every night, your liver needs a twelve hour break. Not sleeping, though I wish I had the time for that, but eating. Every night you should give yourself a solid twelve hours without food so your little liver doesn't accidentally fail. Just kidding. Sort of.

Now you all know my secrets about water. Oh well, I guess I can't copy write them anymore. I strongly suggest following these tips, and not listening to the people who say, "Drinking water makes you bloated." Honestly, where do those people even come from?

Oh, and one more warning- If you (wisely) follow my suggestions, you will guaranteed have to pee every 10 minutes when you start. Don't worry, you don't need any old people medication (is that too offensive?), it's just your body getting used to having the right amount of water everyday. It'll stop- eventually.

~ Mia